Mental Blur…

I am sitting here trying so hard to breathe…

Trying hard to remember when it was when I last felt this way, this particular mix of feeling angry, hurt, and disappointed…

I keep looking in my memories for fragments of little things that would help me remember, but all is blurry…

Or is it all locked where my mind dares not wander…

I will just go to bed now…

I don’t want thoughts that would trouble me, and neither do I think music would soothe me…

Just silence…

I will not try to remember… not a thing… just blankness and blur…

I will hold on to the numbness of that very moment and hold back the tears I cried then… and sleep…

And I don’t want the dreams…

Tomorrow, it will all be forgotten as it will mix with the blur and blend into the numbness…

And I will be ok like that…

Shhhhhh

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~ by insomniac on September 28, 2010.

2 Responses to “Mental Blur…”

  1. Why do you do this to me Ins, I can relate to every single word you’re writing nowfreakingdays.

    • ya deppy you must relate because i haven’t specified what that was about…

      we all go through those feelings, each for their own reason…

      c’est la friken vie :)

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