Two

There is a woman in me who is too independent and too strong to an extent that terrifies me. She is witty, creative and has potential that waits to be unleashed.

She does not need any of what life did not give her, neither does she need what life won’t give her; she can do just fine with everything she has, more than fine actually.

She is too cynical to believe in love and romance; she sees the disappointment miles and miles ahead in every such relationship, and accordingly would prefer to rise above any. She is blunt, borderline mean and rude when provoked, but very helpful and rather funny and friendly.

She is as free spirited as they come, she is like wild horses, her life means freedom… freedom from all bonds and all labels; she doesn’t want to be anyone’s daughter, sister, mother, or lover… she wants to give whatever she has as longs as she wants to give it no strings attached and no binding obligations.

 

 

There is another woman in me who is too kindhearted and nurturing to an extent that shocks and creeps me out.

She is tender, loving, and can light anyone’s world by just being happy or at least in a good mood.

She always wants what she can’t have, and always believes life will give it to her, some way… and as a coping mechanism, she doesn’t dwell on the matter much; she just imagines her life with all the things she still awaits, contently!

She is naïve, and hopelessly romantic to a sickening extent; she sees love and romance from a poetic point of view and believes there is something magical about how love  ends, begins, and then ends again, and so, she succumbs to its endless cycles.

She is compassionate, overly sensitive and proud especially when hurt, yet patient and forgiving.

She is all about belonging and giving all she’s got to those to whom she belongs, unconditionally, no strings attached.

 

 

They are not extremes of one another, they just feel like two different women with different purposes in life and different things they want for themselves. They have their not so beautiful and rather negative sides, but I believe both are good at their core; good enough to never let their evil sides take over. I wish they would teach each other skills so that each would survive and get what she wants without getting the other one in trouble, because unless they do, they will both end up with nothing but disappointment and unaccomplished dreams.

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~ by insomniac on December 17, 2010.

2 Responses to “Two”

  1. I have them too, I think we all do:D
    till now they haven’t fought together they just emerge in different times which i’m certain makes people call me schizophrenic :)
    i kind of don’t mind having too different sides, but i fear to death that they may at some point start fighting each other and leave me completely lost…even more than I’m now.
    I hope they could cooperate,or melt in each other making one normal person for all times with no extremes..

    • they never fought and they are not extremes… they are just different, one takes over and does things her way and when the other one is in charge afterwords she rearranges everything according to her liking…

      they are like two roommates who share one room, they are almost never home at the same time, and whenever either one is home, she moves the furniture in a certain way… somehow a classic case of multi-personality where both personalities are aware of an accept each other…

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